Playing well with others.

Today's rambling.

Looking over some of my old school reports the other day and was amused at how some of the comments, that teachers made about me have shaped my life and in many respects made me who I am today.

One teacher wrote that I didn’t play well with others, I was 5 at the time maybe I had an excuse. Another teacher in my high school years, the wood working teacher or wood shop teacher for my American friends wrote; “If you value your life you will keep him away from power tools and other dangerous equipment. I can’t remember why he wrote this, obviously I did something that made him fear for his life.

Today as an adult I have to say that I don’t do well in committees, for most of my life I have been self- employed. I have steadfastly stayed away from power tools and other wood working equipment, basically anything that can cut something off and is a danger to life and limb.

Over the last 10 years I have been looking at and teaching about Emotional Intelligence (EQ) and political intelligence (PQ) and how these two areas of psychology are played out in the life of the Christian leader.  My observations and some of the conversational experiments I have conducted have shown me that in many cases these two areas, EQ and PQ, do not necessarily go hand in hand. In other words many Christian leaders don’t play well with others.

Before I get lynched by Christian Leaders for being overly negative towards them, let me say I am fully aware of human nature and how different personality types interact and react to each other. The question I ask is: Is not playing well with others affecting our ability to reach the lost for Christ and extend the Kingdom of God, is it continuing to weaken our image with those we wish to reach?

Let me give you a simple example; I met a Church Leader from a medium size church who told me that he that he would fellowship with any minister/pastor from any Christian denomination, except Roman Catholics. His narrow denominational and doctrinal beliefs weakened his position and blinded him to see the things they had in common, rather than ignore the things they didn’t.

There was and is a disconnection between his ability to play well with others and his EQ and PQ. His EQ can be learnt and developed and with time and experience he can overcome such prejudices. Political quotient or PQ is the ability to influence and persuade people to go in a particular direction, build networks and develop leaders, which will not only follow you but have others follow them. It is about building others up to take your place and move your vision forward. The psalmist wrote that God knew me and perceived my thoughts and he knew me in my mother’s womb and knitted me together. (Ps 139). In other words he made me who I am. Once I understand this I can then work on ways to work with others. Being a loner does not help build anything but your own kingdom and empire. As we know these will not last

Once we learn this (PQ) we learn to play well with others. Once we learn to play well with others we become stronger together.