Stress and Burnout.

Stress is not Burnout.

Very recently I found myself having coffee with some church leaders and discussing stress and burnout. There appeared to be the idea that stress and burnout was one and the same thing. Let me say right here right now they are not. In talking with these church leaders I could also detect signs of burnout in each and every one of them, though thankfully none of them were in my opinion burnt out.

 We all experience stress; it is possible to live a life without stress. There is such a thing as good stress – a sense of joy and fulfilment, that feeling of achievement. There is also bad stress (distress) those extreme negative pressures that intrude into our lives -the illness of a loved one, financial stress, the stresses that our children put us through- especially in their teenage years. The stress of running and building a large church has its own particular types of stresses. I believe that the vast majority of great church leaders I have met who have built or in the process of successfully building a large congregation - are in my opinion addicted to stress, it is what drives them and gets their adrenalin pumping, the more stress the more passionate they are. But in all cases they appear to be able to manage their stress levels better than most, this is a vital distinction between those who succeed and those that do not.

Why does church leadership at times appear to be so stressful?

There is no clear cut answer to this question, however over the years I have come up with a list that I think covers the complexities that are church leadership and that are often not found in other professions:

1)      As churches and congregations grow the senior leader finds themselves taking on different tasks, they wear different hats. The problem arises when they don’t know which hat they are wearing.

2)      Administrative overload ensues.

3)      There is often a lack of clearly defined boundaries within church life; everybody feels they own a piece of you. (after all they pay their tithes)

4)      There is a conflict between Leadership and Ministry. Church leaders need to realise that there is a difference between the two.

5)      This can often lead to feelings of inadequacy on the part of the leader, and feelings of incompetence with volunteers, both from your standpoint and theirs.

6)      This leads to a disparity between realistic expectations and the hard reality of life in church.

7)      There is a feeling that tasks are never complete.

8)      The leader finds that they have too much discretionary time on their hands unlike other professions, which can lead to identity issues and feelings of a lack of self worth.

9)      Far too many church leaders have no close friends.

This is by no means an exhaustive list and I am not going to go, at this time, into an explanation of all of them and give reasons why church leadership is different to other professions. Needless to say all of these things can produce huge stresses in our lives. It is how we react and respond to these stresses, how we manage them that are important. It can mean the difference between a successful functioning church and leadership as compared to a small irrelevant church and a burnt out leader.

What then is burnout?

Burnout is extreme physical and mental exhaustion. There are many different symptoms, having one symptom does not mean that you are experiencing burnout. There needs to be a combination of all the symptoms to lead to full blown burnout. However knowing these symptoms can help us to modify our behaviour before it is too late.

The symptoms are, decreased energy, that feeling that you don’t really want to get out of bed in the morning. The inability to shake off those cold or flu like symptoms. Interrupted sleep patterns. An inability to see a way forward- even with really minor issues and problems, issues that would have otherwise been child’s play in normal circumstances. Increasing irritability with people who don’t see things or do things your way. Cynicism and negativity with oneself, others, work and the world in general.

Personality type also plays a role in burnout. The passionate in your face leader or the quiet introverted leader are often put on pedestals by their congregations, their leadership teams and by the volunteers in their churches. There is an expectation to succeed and -to a certain extent to have all the answers. In the area of personal counselling the church leader is constantly seeing the negative side of a person’s life. A church leader is either too goal orientated or too spiritually slack in his leadership, each can lead to its own set of problems. More than any other profession church leaders are acutely aware of their responsibilities toward their congregation but at the same time being aware that they are human just like everyone else. All of these things combined with the symptoms mentioned above can all lead if we are not careful to burnout.

How then can we avoid burnout?

Most leaders I know have a spiritual routine, they read their bibles and other related materials and pray at the same time every day, they fast regularly, they set aside time to meditate and to prepare their sermons. But sometimes this can become stale and monotonous. The first thing I would advise is stay spiritually fresh; go to someone else’s church and just receive, go  on a spiritual retreat. I have a friend, a Pentecostal, who often goes on a spiritual retreat with a group of Anglican priests, I have another friend who twice a year goes and spends a few days in a Carmelite monastery. All these things are done to try and stay fresh and in tune with God. Go do a master’s degree, if you are that way inclined, one paper at a time at your local university or theological college.

Secondly, take regular time off, church leadership is not like other 9 till 5 jobs, you often work more than 40 hours a week. Create good sleep patterns, get into the habit of trying to go to bed at a certain time and up at a set time. Eat well, eat sensibly, Big Mac breakfasts are not the answer. I believe in a holistic leadership philosophy that is, not just based on ability or talent or calling but good eating and regular exercise. A large unfit, overweight church leader is not a good example to obese teens. The fitter you are the more healthy food you eat the better you cope with issues problems and stress. The better you feel.

Don’t be afraid of change if you need to change something in yourself, do it. Change is good. Be spontaneous, go meet some mates change your routine, get some real close Christian friends that are outside of your church. Lastly, don’t be afraid of having fun doing it. You have a job that is the greatest job in the world, a calling and vocation that is like no other.

A stressed out (bad stress) and burnt out church leader is no good to anyone let alone the Kingdom of God.